Transformers Fan Purity Test

by Diana Calder (az529@freenet.carleton.ca)

Introduction

Are a.t.t.ers "Transformers fans"?  Sure!  But just how much of a fan
_are_ you?  TransFans can range from the casual fan, who cherishes a few
childhood toys, to the geek who knows every tech spec and episode by
heart, to the deranged psychopath who lives to dig through Hasbro/Kenner
garbage cans.  This is the "official" alt.tv.transformers test to
determine how much Transformers rule your life.  This test was inspired by
the alt.tv.animaniacs "Animaniacs Fan Purity Test" and the various "You
Know You're Obsessed with Tfs When..." posts on a.t.t.  To score sections
1 through 7, simply count the total of "yes" answers, and add bonus points
where indicated.  The questions were written by me - Diana Calder
(az529@freenet.carleton.ca).  Suggestions for changes in format, scoring,
etc. are appreciated, and so are submissions of questions for the next
version of the test - but please e-mail them to me rather than just
posting them.  Those who contribute to the test will receive credit for
their contributions.  And now -

"Transform and roll out!"

Section 1: Viewing Habits

1.1.  Have you ever watched Transformers?
1.2.  Do you watch it regularly?
1.3.  Have you ever taped Transformers for future viewing?
1.4.  Did you keep the tape after watching it?
1.5.  Do you have more than 10 episodes on tape?
1.6.  Do you own more than 20 hours of taped Transformers
shows?
1.7.  Do you record reruns of Transformers shows you've already
recorded?
1.8.  Do you have EVERY  US Transformers episode on tape?
1.9.  Do you have any Japanese Transformers episodes on tape?
1.10.  Do you have EVERY  Japanese Transformers episode on
tape?
1.11.  Do you have episodes in a language OTHER than English or
Japanese on tape?
1.12.  If you answered yes to any of the above, can I get copies?
1.13.  Have you ever copied your Transformers tapes for a friend?
1.14.  Do you have audio tapes of Transformers episodes?
1.15.  Do you have audio tapes of EVERY episode (in any
language)?
1.16.  Do you have audio tapes consisting solely of all the music
from the series?
1.17.  Have you seen every episode broadcast in your area?
1.18.  Have you seen EVERY episode (in any language)?
1.19.  Have you ever had a friend who lives somewhere else (or
gets cable/satellite stations that you don't) tape episodes not seen in
your area for you?
1.20.  Have you ever had a total stranger who lives somewhere else
(or gets cable/satellite stations that you don't) tape episodes not
seen in your area for you?
1.21.  Do you keep track of which episodes you have and haven't
seen?
1.22.  Do you keep track of which episodes you have and haven't
taped?
1.23.  Have you taped every commercial or promotion for
Transformers?
1.24.  Do you keep original and Sci-Fi channel versions of
Transformers episodes?
1.25.  Do you keep original and G2 versions of Transformers
episodes?
1.26.  Do you keep Sci-Fi and G2 versions of Transformers
episodes?
1.27.  Do you keep original, Sci-Fi, AND G2 versions of
Transformers episodes?
1.28.  Did you edit out the G2 beginning, end, and commercial
changes from episodes that you only have G2 versions of and
insert the "correct" ones from original broadcasts that you DO
have on tape?
1.29.  Have you ever watched Transformers for more than 10 hours
straight?
1.30.  ...other than at Botcon?
1.31.  Have you ever skipped something you were supposed to do
in order to watch Transformers?
1.32.  Did skipping this something have repercussions that haunted
you for more than a month?
1.33.  ...was it worth it anyway?
1.34.  Have you ever used Transformers as an excuse not to do
something?
1.35.  Have you ever watched more than 5 episodes within a 24
hour period?
1.36.  ...other than at Botcon?
1.37.  Did you pause the tape for any reason other than needing to
take a break?
1.38.  Have you attended a Botcon?
1.39.  Did you attend both Botcons?
1.40.  Have you attended an anime or giant robot-themed
convention other than Botcon?
1.41.  Did you travel more than 100 miles?
1.42.  ...more than 500 miles?
1.43.  ...more than 1000 miles?
1.44.  ...more than 3000 miles?
1.45.  Did you see the movie in a theater?
1.46.  ...when it was first released?
1.47.  Did you beg/whine/plead to persuade your parent(s) to take
you?
1.48.  Did you bribe a friend/relative/neighbour's child to go with
you to avoid embarrassment?
1.49.  Is Transformers the only reason you have a television?
1.50.  ...or have a VCR?
1.51.  ...or have a satellite dish?
1.52.  ...or have cable?
1.53.  Do you watch Transformers with your friends?
1.54.  ...with your significant other?
1.55.  ...with your kids?
1.56.  ...with your parents?
1.57.   ...with people you met while watching Transformers?
1.58.  Have you been watching Transformers since it was first
broadcast as Transformers: Generation 2?
1.59.  ...since it was first broadcast on the Sci-Fi channel?
1.60.  ...since it premiered on US television?
1.61.  ...since it premiered in Japan?
1.62.  Do you want more episodes?
1.63.  ...more than 100?
1.64.  ...more than 1000?
1.65.  ...would you watch them all?
1.66.  ...would you pay for them to be made?
1.67.  ...would you put together a production team and make them
yourself?
1.68.  Do you take notes while watching Transformers?
1.69.  ...do you post them?
1.70.  Have you ever reviewed Transformers (episodes or movie)?
1.71.  ...for your own personal experience?
1.72.  ...for a newspaper or newsletter?
1.73.  ...for a magazine?
1.74.  ...for Usenet?
1.75.  Do you sing along with the intro song?
1.76.  Do you sing along with the movie soundtrack?
1.77.  Do you recite the entire soundtrack of each show as you
watch?
1.78.  ...with sound effects?
1.79.  Did you ever wear out your Transformer audio tape, CD, or
video tape through excessive use?
1.80.  Did you ever break your tape player, CD player, or VCR
while repeatedly listening to/viewing Transformers material?
1.81.  ...so badly that it couldn't be fixed?
1.82.  Did you go to see _The Professional_ in the theatre just
because it had Transformers episodes playing in the background in

1.83.  Did you buy a copy of _The Professional_ just because it
had Transformers episodes playing in the background in several
scenes?
1.84.  Have you ever noticed a continuity error in the series/movie?
1.85.  ...did it annoy you?
1.86.  ...did you lose sleep over it?
1.87.  ...did you make up a very elaborate justification of why it
isn't really a continuity error and fool yourself into believing it just
so that you could get on with your life and not end up as crazy as
the cartoon Galvatron?
1.88.  Do you keep lists of continuity errors?
1.89.  ...and send them to Hasbro/Sunbow demanding corrections?
1.90.  ...and have them reply?
1.91.  ...and apologize?
1.92  ...and admit that you were right and they messed up?
1.93.  Do you notice whenever a character is off-model?
1.94.  ...and make up justifications for it?  (cf. 1.87)



Section 2: Reading Habits

2.00.  Have you ever read a Transformers comic?
2.01.  Have you ever purchased a Transformers comic?
2.02.  Do you still have it?
2.03.  Do you have more than 10 Transformers comics?
2.04.  ...more than 50?
2.05.  Do you have multiple copies of Transformers comics (one to
read and one as a collector's item)?
2.06.  Do you have EVERY G1 Transformers comic?
2.07.  ...including special series like Headmasters and G.I.Joe?
2.08.  Do you have EVERY  G2 Transformers comic?
2.09.  ...EVERY UK Transformers comic?
2.10.  ...EVERY Transformers comic?
2.11.  Have you ever had a friend who lives elsewhere buy comics
not sold in your area for you?
2.12.  Have you purchased every non-Transformers comic in which
a TF character appears or is mentioned?
2.13.  Have you ever written a letter to the letters column of a TF
comic?
2.14.  ...and actually sent it?
2.15.  ...and had it published in the comic?
2.16.  Does "Please, please don't mention issue #3" mean anything
to you?
2.17.  Have you been buying TF comics since the first issue of G2
was printed?
2.18.  ...since the first issue of G1 was printed?
2.19.  ...since you started reading a.t.t. and discovered a burning
need to know what the Car Wash of Doom was and who The
Mechanic was?
2.20.  Do you want more TF comics?
2.21.  ...more than 100?
2.22.  ...more than 1000?
2.23.  ...would you read them all?
2.24.  ...would you pay for them to be made?
2.25.  ...would you start your own publishing company and make
them yourself?
2.26.  Have you ever reviewed Transformers comics?
2.27.  ...for your own personal experience?
2.28.  ...for a newspaper or newsletter?
2.29.  ...for a magazine?
2.30.  ...for Usenet?
2.31.  Have you ever read a non-Marvel TF comic?
2.32.  ...in a language other than English?
2.33.  Have you ever read a Transformers book other than the
comic?
2.34.  Do you own one of them?
2.35.  ...all of them?
2.36.  Can you name a writer who worked on the Transformers
comic series?
2.37.  Can you name ALL the writers who worked on the
Transformers comic series?
2.38.  Can you recognize the writer(s) that worked on any given
issue just by reading?
2.39.  Can you name an artist who worked on the Transformers
comic series?
2.40.  Can you name ALL the artists who worked on the
Transformers comic series?
2.41.  Can you recognize the artist(s) that did any given issue just
by looking?
2.42.  ...at one page?
2.43.  ...at one panel?
2.44.  ...at one character?
2.45.  Have you ever noticed a continuity error in the comic?
2.46.  ...did it annoy you?
2.47.  ...did you lose sleep over it?
2.48.  ...did you make up a very elaborate justification of why it
isn't really a continuity error and fool yourself into believing it just
so that you could get on with your life and not end up as crazy as
the cartoon Galvatron?
2.49.  Do you keep lists of continuity errors?
2.50.  ...and send them to Marvel demanding corrections?
2.51.  ...and have them reply?
2.52.  ...and apologize?
2.53.  ...and admit that you were right and they messed up?
2.54.  Do you notice whenever a character is off-model?
2.55.  ...and make up justifications for it?  (cf. 2.48)

Section 3: Transformers Knowledge  

3.1.  Can you sing the entire theme song (any version)?
3.2.  ...backwards?
3.3.  ...in a language other than English?
3.4.  ...in a language it's never been aired in?
3.5.  ...in Cybertronese?
3.6.  Can you sing at least two of the movie songs OTHER than the
Transformers theme?
3.7.  ...in a language other than English?
3.8 .  ...in a language they've never been aired/recorded in?
3.9.  ...in Cybertronese?
3.10.  Can you sing ALL of the movie songs?
3.11.  Do you sing them in the car?
3.12.  ...in the shower?
3.13.  ...in public?
3.14.  ...to your friends?
3.15.  ...to your Transformers?
3.16.  Can you name any non-Transformer characters that
appeared in the comic, cartoon, or movie?
3.17.  ...other than the Witwickys?
3.18.  Can you name all the first-season cartoon's regular
characters?
3.19.  Can you name ALL the cartoon's regular characters?
3.20.  ...in order of first appearance?
3.21.  Can you name all the movie characters?
3.22.  ...in order of appearance?
3.23.  Can you name all the regular comic characters?
3.24.  ...in order of first appearance?
3.25.  Can you name all the toy characters?
3.26.  ...in order of first release?
3.27.  Can you name ALL the characters that ever appeared in the
cartoon, movies, comics, or toys, including non-Transformers?
3.28.  Can you recite (from memory) complete descriptions of the
appearance of more than five Transformers?
3.29.  ...more than ten?
3.30.  ...more than fifty?
3.31.  ...more than a hundred?
3.32.  ...ALL of the Transformers?
3.33.  Can you recite (from memory) the tech specs and character
descriptions for more than five Transformers?
3.34.  ...more than ten?
3.35.  ...more than fifty?
3.36.  ...more than a hundred?
3.37.  ...ALL of the Transformers?
3.38.  Is there an episode that you know the title of?
3.39.  Do you know all the episode titles?
3.40.  Do you refer to episodes by title, rather than description?
3.41.  Do you know the first airdates of every episode?
3.42.  ...ALL the airdates of every episode?
3.43.  Can you name at least one voice actor from the
Transformers series?
3.44.  ...from the movie?
3.45.  Can you name the voice actors for every regular character?
3.46.  ...for EVERY character?
3.47.  Can you name someone other than a voice actor whose
name appears in the credits?
3.48.  Can you name EVERY name that appears in the credits?
3.49.  Can you name an animation studio that did animation for
Transformers?
3.50.  Have you memorized an episode?
3.51.  ...ALL the episodes?
3.52.  ...the movie?
3.53.  ...all the episodes AND the movie?
3.54.  Can you perform them with a good impersonation of the
voices?
3.55.  Have you memorized an entire comic issue?
3.56.  ...an entire comic story-arch?
3.57.  ...ALL the comic issues?
3.58.  Do you get all the references in "Dare to be Stupid"?
3.59.  Do you get all Wreck Gar's references in the movie?
3.60.  ...in the series?
3.61.  ...without asking on a.t.t.?
3.62.  Do you know Optimus Prime's original name?
3.63.  And the name of the episode it was in?
3.64.  Do you know how to spell Optimus's girlfriend's name?
3.65.  ...and who on a.t.t. wrote a long, logical post justifying that
spelling and no other?
3.63.  Can you identify any show just from the voice-credits?
3.64.  Can you identify every show just from the voice-credits?
3.65.  Do you (not so) secretly wish that Hot Rod would just let
Daniel fall into the lake and drown?
3.66.  Have you ever won any Transformers trivia contests?
3.67.  Have you ever won a non-Transformers trivia contest
because of something you learned from watching/reading
Transformers?
3.68.  Do you know which cartoon episode "City of Steel" is?
3.69.  ...which comic issues star The Mechanic and The Car Wash
of Doom?
3.70.  Is it obvious to you why I lumped the above episode and
issues together?

Section 4: Creative Activities  

4.1.  Have you ever written a parody of a song from the show or
movie?
4.2.  Have you ever written a parody of a non-Transformers song to
make it about Transformers?
4.3.  Have you ever sung a Transformers song in public?
4.4.  Have you ever sung one of your parodies in public?
4.5.  Have you ever sung a Transformers song to try and impress
someone?
4.6.  ...well, were they impressed?
4.7.  Have you ever written a piece of Transformers fanfiction?
4.8.  ...was it more than 10K?
4.9.  ...more than 30K?
4.10.  ...more than 100K?
4.11.  ...did you make an audio recording of it?
4.12.  ...did you animate it?
4.13.  ...was it well received?
4.14.  1 bonus point if it was well-received on alt.tv.transformers.
4.15.  2 bonus points if it was well-received on rec.arts.animation.
4.16.  3 bonus points if it was well-received on
rec.arts.anime.stories.
4.17.  Have you ever written a fanfic that only you would ever
"get"?
4.18.  Have you ever quoted a fanfic?
4.19.  ...was it yours?
4.20.  If not, did you quote it to the original author?
4.21.  Have you ever had your fanfic quoted?
4.22.  Have you ever appeared in someone else's fanfic?
4.23.  ...without asking for it?
4.24.  Have you ever drawn Transformers-related fan art?
4.25.  ...was it better than Galan?
4.26.  ...better than Delbo?
4.27.  ...better than Wildman?
4.28.  ...better than Yaniger?
4.29.  ...better than Senior?
4.30.  Is it obvious to you why I named those artists in the order I
did?
4.31.  Do you do Transformers voice impressions?
4.32.  ...that actually sound like the characters intended?
4.33.  ...on your answering machine's outgoing message?
4.34.  ...when leaving a message in someone's voice mail?
4.35.  ...while speaking with an operator?
4.36.  ...during a job interview?
4.37.  ...and get hired anyway?
4.38.  ...and get hired BECAUSE of it?
4.39.  Have you ever submitted something Transformers-related
for a grade?
4.40.  ...did you get higher than a B?
4.41.  ...even though the grader had never heard of Transformers?
4.42.  Have you ever attempted to psychoanalyze any of the
characters?
4.43.  ...did you submit the results to Hasbro/Kenner/Marvel?
4.44.  Have you ever made a plan to seize control of the world's
energy resources?
4.45.  ...did it work?
4.46.  Do you have any Transformers tattoos?
4.47.  Have you painted an Autobot or Decepticon symbol on your
car?
4.48.  Have you painted your car as an exact replica of an Autobot
or Decepticon?
4.49.  Have you considered rebuilding your car as an exact
transforming replica of an Autobot or Decepticon?
4.50.  ...well, did you do it?
4.51.  Have you ever modified Transformers merchandise to make
it cooler (like giving Ironhide or Ratchet real faces or repainting
Rumble and Frenzy to make them the right colours)?
4.52.  Have you ever made your own Transformers clothing or had
someone else make it for you?
4.53.  Have you ever created your own Transformers character?
4.54.  ...designed your own Transformers toy?
4.55.  ...and built it?
4.56.  ...and had Hasbro/Kenner build it?
4.57.  Have you come up with good reasons for Transformers
characters to be holy or religious figures?
4.58.  Do you hold any *serious* theological beliefs on the basis of
or directly supported by clips from Transformers?
4.59.  Have you ever requested a piece of Transformers artwork
from some sort of artist?
4.60.  Have you named any of your children after a Transformers
character?
4.61.   ...did your significant other understand?
4.62.   ...did your friends know this was bound to happen?
4.63.  Have you legally changed your own name to be the same as
an Transformers character?
4.64.   ...did your significant other understand?
4.65.   ...and change his/her name too?
4.66.  Do you have a Transformers shrine?
4.67.  ...do your friends come to gawk?
4.68.  ...did they try to copy your idea?
4.69.  Have you ever had a Transformers related dream?
4.70.  ...that came true?
4.71.  ...that you wrote down and posted?
4.73.  Have you ever re-enacted any Transformers story for your
friends?
4.74.  ...did you create props and use toys of the characters to help
with the re-enactment?
4.75.  Do you spend time practicing your character voice/s or
accent/s?
4.76.  Have you ever made your own Transformers toys because
none of the stores where you live carried them?
4.77.  ...then gone to a store a few weeks later and discovered that
they sell Transformers toys there?
4.78.  Did you make Transformers toys for yourself because the
Hasbro ones were so cheap and ugly that you knew you could do a
better job?
4.79.  Have you created any Transformers crafts other than
artwork?
4.80.  Have you made a compilation video of your favorite scenes?
4.81.  ...did you include any scenes with the Witwickys or other
humans?
4.82.  ...did you include any Wheelie scenes?
4.83.  Have you ever been mistaken for an "animation/comic
professional" due to the extent of your fan activities?
4.84.  Have you ever responded to the posting of a fan-document
with a posting full of material that _should_ have been in the
fan-document, but wasn't?
4.85.  ...was your post nearly as large as the original?
4.86.  ...larger?
4.87.  Have you ever given copies of your fan works to anyone
involved in the production of Transformers?

Section 5: Computer Habits  

5.1.  Do you read alt.tv.transformers?
5.2.  ...more than once a week?
5.3.  ...more than once a day?
5.4.  ...have you read every article?
5.5.  ...did you print them out?
5.6.  Do you post to alt.tv.transformers?
5.7.  ...more than once a week?
5.8.  ...more than once a day?
5.9.  Is your name immediately recognizable by all a.t.t. readers? 
5.10.  Do you post informational documents to a.t.t.? (FAQ, Tech
Spec List, Toy List, Fanfic List, etc.)
5.11.  Have you ever posted a Transformers-related post to a group
OTHER than a.t.t.?
5.12.  ...was it a group that otherwise would have NOTHING to do
with Transformers? (rec.arts.animation, rec.arts.anime, etc. don't
count)
5.13.  Have you ever posted a Transformers screen grab?
5.14.  ...were you the one who digitized it?
5.15.  ...did you alter it in any way?
5.16.  Have you ever posted a Transformers sound sample?
5.17.  ...were you the one who digitized it?
5.18.  ...did you alter it in any way?
5.19.  Have you ever posted a fanfic?
5.20.  Have you ever posted on a.t.t. to correct another's spelling,
or quoting of a line?
5.21.  Have you ever posted something Transformers-related that
was longer than 300 lines?
5.22.  ...and that wasn't something uuencoded?
5.23.  Have you ever posted to tell everyone how much you love
the show/comic/toys?
5.24.  ...to tell everyone the show/comic/toyline has been renewed?
5.25.  ...to tell everyone you're going on vacation?
5.26.  Have you ever seen mass unrest in alt.tv.transformers?
5.27.  ...was it because you posted something?
5.28.  ...was it because you forgot to post something?
5.29.  ...was it because you went on vacation?
5.30.  ...was it because you asked about Unicron versus the Death
Star?
5.31.  ...was it because you insisted that it was FIBRIR, not
FIRRIB?
5.32.  ...was it because you called Ravage a dog?
5.33.   Have you set up an FTP site, mail server, or BBS just for
Transformers?
5.34.  ...and this caused you to be unable to receive phone calls?
5.35.  ...and you spent over  $100 to make it a better site?
5.36.  ...and you spent over  $500 to make it a better site?
5.37.  ...and you spent over $1000 to make it a better site?
5.38.  ...did you buy a new computer for the express reason of
running this site?
5.39.  Do you have a Transformers based character on a
MUD/MUCK/MUSH?
5.40.  ...do you stay in character?
5.41.  Is your account named after a Transformers character?
5.42.  ...have you been confused for the real thing?
5.43.  ...was it given to you without your asking?
5.44.  Do you have over 1 MB of Transformers' sound samples on
your computer?
5.45.  ...more than 10 MB?
5.46.  ...more than 50 MB?
5.47.  ...more than 100 MB?
5.48.  ...more than 1GB?
5.49.  Do you have more than 1 MB of Transformers pictures?
5.50.  ...more than 10 MB?
5.51.  ...more than 50 MB?
5.52.  ...more than 100 MB?
5.53.  ...more than 1 GB?
5.54.  Do you have more than 1 MB of Transformers fan fiction?
5.55.  ...more than 10 MB?
5.56.  ...more than 50 MB?
5.57.  ...more than 100 MB?
5.58.  ...more than 1 GB?
5.59.  Do you attach Transformers' sounds to System Events on
your home computer?
5.60.  ...your computer at work?
5.61.  Do you have a computer reserved solely for Transformers'
sound samples?
5.62.  Have you named a machine for a Transformers character?
5.63.  Do you have the ASCII art of the Autobot/Decepticon
symbols?
5.64.  Have you digitized the movie soundtrack?
5.65.  ...and posted it or put it on an FTP or WWW site?
5.66.  Do you have the Transformers Toy List?
5.67.  Have you memorized it?
5.68.  Do you have the Transformers comic summary lists?
5.69.  Have you memorized them?
5.70.  Do you have one of the Tech Spec lists?
5.71.  Have you memorized it?
5.72.  Do you have Transformers icons on your computer?
5.73.  Do you have a Transformers startup screen or wallpaper?
5.74.  Do you have a Transformers  screen saver?
5.75.  ...that you designed yourself?
5.76.  Do you have a Transformers font?
5.77.  ...that you designed yourself?
5.78.  Have you posted any photos, comics, or other printed
material?
5.79.  ...did you digitize it?
5.80.  ...did you alter it in any way?
5.81.  Did you buy your sound card just for playing Transformers
sounds?
5.82.  Did you buy your scanner just for scanning Transformers
materials?
5.83.  Did you buy your video capture board just for capturing
Transformers video?
5.84.  Did you buy your computer just to digitize Transformers
sounds and images and read a.t.t.?
5.85.  Did you buy your modem just to read a.t.t.?
5.86.  Do you have a character on one of the Transformer
MUSHes?
5.87.  ...more than one of the TF MUSHes?
5.88.  ...is it a Feature Character?
5.89.  ...is it an NFC?
5.90.  Have you ever spent more than 30 straight hours on a
Transformers MUSH?
5.91.  ...and been awake the whole time?
5.92.  Have you coded a Transformers MUSH?
5.93.  Have you coded a Transformers computer game?
5.94.  ...or Transformers DOOM WAD files?
5.95.  Have you ever been shredded, slashed, or generally ravaged
(pun intended ;) by a certain Plumed Serpent?
5.96.  ...did you survive to learn something from the experience?
5.97.  Have you been mentioned in an a.t.t. informational
document (FAQ, fanfic list, this test, etc.)?
5.98.  Have you ever posted an article from the media reviewing or
discussing Transformers?
5.99.  Have you ever spent more than 4 hours setting up a graphics
viewer just to see a Transformers picture/screen grab?
5.100.  ...did you ask for help from someone over 100 miles away
to set it up?
5.101.  ...did you give help to someone over 100 miles away
setting it up?
5.102.  ...did it work?
5.103.  ...was the picture really worth it?
5.104.  Do you remember a certain post regarding proving
something about the Universal Greeting?
5.105.  ...well, did you help the poster prove their point?


Section 6:  Shopping Habits  
  
6.1.  Have you ever bought a Transformers related piece of
merchandise?
6.2.  ...before the store stocked it?
6.3.  ...out of the box they shipped it in?
6.4.  ...and quoted Transformers while doing it?
6.5.  Have you ever spent more than $500 on Transformers in one
day?
6.6.  ...not including Japanese Transformers?
6.7.  ...other than at Botcon?
6.8.  Have you ever imported Transformers merchandise from the
US?
6.9.  ...from Japan?
6.10.  ...from Europe?
6.11.  ...that cost as much in shipping as the actual product?
6.12.  ...that you later discovered was available in your own
country?
6.13.  ...but you didn't care 'cos you got a package from another
country?
6.14.  ...that wouldn't actually work in your own country?
6.15.  ...did you have to spend money to make it work?
6.16.     ...more than $100?
6.17.     ...more than $200?
6.18.     ...more than $500?
6.19.  Do you get recognized when you enter a toy store?
6.20.  Do you get asked "do you have any new info on
Transformers" by the people at the toy stores?
6.21.  ...when you say 'yes', does the sales staff listen intently?
6.22.  Have you ever talked about Transformers with a toy store
employee?
6.23.  ...for more than 5 minutes?
6.24.  ...30 minutes?
6.25.  Do you own the Transformers Soundtrack?
6.26.  Do you own both the cassette and CD versions of the
Transformers Soundtrack?
6.27.  ...have you ever forced a captive audience of non-fans to
listen to it?
6.28.  Have you purchased a Transformers videotape?
6.29.  ...2 of them?
6.30.  ...3 of them?
6.31.  ...All of them?
6.32.  Did you try to order the movie videotape/laserdisk?
6.33.  ...even though they weren't available?
6.34.  Did you ask the video store every week if the video/laserdisk
was available?
6.35.  Did they ask you to stop coming in and asking whether the
video/laserdisk was available?
6.36.  Did you finally rent the video from a video store then "lose"
it and pay the fine in order to finally get a copy?
6.37.  Have you ever been called by anyone at a toy store to let you
know about Transformers merchandise?
6.38.  Did you note all the differences between the Unicron story
as in the movie and the story in the comic and write to Marvel
demanding a corrected comic?
6.39.  ...or to Marvel/Sunbow demanding a corrected movie?
6.40.  Do you have the Transformers party invitations?
6.41.  ...coloring book(s)?
6.42.  ...G2 Tiger Handheld Electronic Game?
6.43.  ...collector's case(s)?
6.44.  ...race car set?
6.45.  ...toy train set?
6.46.  Do you own a G1 Transformer?
6.47.  Do you own five G1 Transformers?
6.48.  ...twenty-five G1 Transformers?
6.49.  ...seventy-five G1 Transformers?
6.50.  ...two hundred G1 Transformers (including Fort Max)?
6.51.  ...ALL the G1 Transformers?
6.52.  Do you own a G2 Transformer?
6.53.  Do you own five G2 Transformers?
6.54.  Do you own ALL the G2 Transformers?
6.55.  Do you have more than 3 pieces of Transformers
merchandise that are not toys?
6.56.  Does all this occasionally cause you to doubt your sanity?
6.57.  Do you have a Transformers shirt?
6.58.  ...more than 2?
6.59.  ...a different one for every day of the week?
6.60.  ...for every day of the month?
6.61.  ...for every day in a year?
6.62.  Do you wear only Transformers stuff every day?
6.63.  ...from head to toe?
6.64.  Did you buy a Playskool "My First Transformer" because
you were desperate to buy SOMETHING, ANYTHING
Transformer-related and the stores didn't have any new G2 stuff in
yet?
6.65.  Did you then decide to buy all three "My First Tfs" just
because they were called Transformers?

Section 7:  Miscellaneous

7.1.  Have you ever said, "Bah weep graaagnah wheep, ni ni bong!"
when introducing yourself to someone?
7.2.  ...other than at Botcon?
7.3.  Do you quote Transformers in conversation?
7.4.  ...more than once a day?
7.5.  ...besides the Universal Greeting, "Roll out", or "Till all are
one"?
7.6.  Do you quote Transformers to people who have never seen it?
7.6.  Have you ever been to Oregon?
7.7.  ...was it because of Transformers that you went?
7.8.  Will you use the results of this test to try to impress people?
7.9.  Would the people you hang around with be impressed by your
score on this test?
7.10.  Have you ever been offended by a question on this test?
7.11.  ...would you like to go play fetch with Ravage?
7.12.  Do you consider any of the characters (Transformers or
other) to be your role model?
7.13.  When faced with a difficult decision do you resolve it by
thinking, "What would  do?"
7.14.  1 bonus point if the character you chose was Optimus Prime
or Megatron.
7.15.  2 bonus points if the character you chose was Bumblebee or
Starscream.
7.16.  3 bonus points if the character you chose was Grimlock.
7.17.  4 bonus points if the character you chose was a Witwicky or
Wheelie.
7.18.  Do you have any friends that work at Hasbro/Kenner?
7.19.  ...have you met them in person?
7.20.  Have you met one of the voice actors, animators, artists, or
writers?
7.21.  ...more than once?
7.22.  ...more than five times?
7.23.  ...did you travel more than 100 miles to get there?
7.24.  ...more than 500 miles?
7.25.  ...more than 1000 miles?
7.26.  Did you ever apply for a job at Marvel/Hasbro/Kenner?
7.27.  ...did they hire you?
7.28.  ...as soon as you walked in the door?
7.29.  ...was this the job interview from 4.38?
7.30.  Have you ever called your local broadcaster or
Hasbro/Sunbow?
7.31.  ...to tell them about how great Transformers is?
7.32.  ...to get some inside information?
7.33.  ...to get new episodes?
7.34.  Have you ever argued about the movie song lyrics?
7.35.  ...were you right?
7.36.  ...did you call the writer to clear things up?
7.37.  Have you ever argued about which is better, the cartoon or
the comic?
7.38.  Have you ever argued about FIRRIB?
7.39.  ...on a.t.t.?
7.40.  ...with Frenzy?
7.41.  Have you made a Transformers fan out of someone?
7.42.  ...more than 5 people?
7.43.  ...more than 10?
7.44.  ...everyone you know?
7.45.  ...everyone you encounter?
7.46.  Are you annoyed that your favorite characters aren't regulars
on the show/in the comic?
7.47.  ...have you tried to get someone to change this?
7.48.  ...did they try?
7.49.  Are you annoyed that the Autobots always win?
7.50.  ...have you tried to get someone to change this?
7.51.  ...did they try?
7.52.  Do you wonder why there seem to be five times as many
Autobots as Decepticons and the Autobots always win yet in the
movie all they have control of are a couple of Cybertron's moons
while the Decepticons control Cybertron?
7.53.  ...have you made up an elaborate explanation for this and
posted it to a.t.t.?
7.54.  Has it ever bothered you that one shot kills Autobots in the
movie yet they were virtually indestructible before it?
7.55.  ...have you ever made up an elaborate explanation for this
(other than that it was part of a marketing ploy to introduce new
Transformers into the toy line) and posted it to a.t.t.?
7.56.  Have you ever requested a song from the TF movie on the
radio?
7.57.  ...did it get played?
7.58.  ...did it become a popular song after?
7.59.  Do you play Transformers songs while driving?
7.60.  ...to work every day?
7.61.  ...to school every day?
7.62.  ...while traveling?
7.63.  ...while traveling to Botcon?
7.64.  ...while cruising?
7.65.  Do you have a complete collection indexed by shows
relevant to any given topic?
7.66.  ...do you use the index to illustrate points with clips from
Transformers when you have friends over to your house?
7.67.  ...do you bring the tapes with you so can illustrate points at
your friend's houses?
7.68.  Do you bring them everywhere so you can illustrate points
no matter where you go?
7.69.  Do you deliberately start conversations that have relevant
allusions in Transformers just so you can show the clips?
7.70.  Do you have an obsession with Transformers above real
people?
7.71.  ...and do you refuse to seek professional help and get a real
girl/boyfriend?
7.72.  ...would it be impossible for someone like you to get a real
girl/boyfriend anyway?
7.73.  ...would you only get involved with someone equally
obsessed with Tfs?
7.74.  Have you ever mailed/emailed the broadcasters of
Transformers?
7.75.  ...did you get a reply?
7.76.  Are you highly annoyed that your score on this test implies
you're not much of a fan?
7.77.  ...will you be losing sleep over this?
7.78.  ...will you be sending questions to me in the hopes that I'll
include them and that you can increase your score?
7.79.  Do you keep anything Transformers-related from the
newspaper, whether it's an article or a picture of a toy that's being
advertised for $12.99 at Toys'R'Us?
7.80.  Have you ever argued about Skyfire/Jetfire's name?
7.81.  Have you ever argued about what make/model of car or type
of airplane a Transformer was?
7.82.  ...were you right?
7.83.  Have you dressed up as a Transformers character for
Halloween?
7.84.  ...and made your costume transform?
7.85.  Would you want to be a Transformers character (yourself,
not an existing one)?
7.86.  ...even if you could never go back to "real life" again?
7.87.  ...even if you had to take over Cyclonus's job as Galvatron's
punching bag for the first century or two?
7.88.  ...even if you had to be Wheelie's room-mate and listen to
his rhymes twenty-four hours a day for the next few centuries?
7.89.  Have you ever used Transformers as a mascot(s) for a club?
7.90.  ...for a fraternity?
7.91.  ...for an organization not mentioned above?
7.92.  Has anybody asked you the question, "What are
Transformers?"
7.93.  ...did you tell them?
7.94.  ...did you sing them the theme song?
7.95.  ...did you sing all the songs from the movie?
7.96.  Have you ever travelled anywhere when your primary reason
for doing so was to see one or more a.t.t.er(s)?
7.97.  ...did you travel more than 100 miles?
7.98.  ...more than 1000 miles?
7.99.  ...more than 3000 miles?


SCORING

Take the total number of "yes" answers you had for sections 1-7,
and add any bonus points.  Now find out just where you rank:

      0 Sharkticon:  If you had a brain, you'd be dangerous.
   1-25 Quintesson:  If you could make up your mind which face to
use, you might actually watch Transformers.
  26-50 Wheelie:  Your memory's worse than your rhymes. 
  51-75  Galvatron: Your circuits are a little too scrambled for this
test.
  76-100 Blurr:  Stop watching the show on fast forward!
101-125 Prowl:  Logic will get you a long way, but this test is
really too illogical for logic.
126-150 Swindle:  You watch whenever you sense something
worthwhile will be on.
151-175 Nightbird:  You're a Transformer at heart.
176-200 Grimlock:  You love a good story about petro-rabbits.
201-225 Starscream:  A few more points and you might make
Decepticon Leader.
226-250 Unicron:  Good try, but not quite good enough.
251-275 Rodimus Prime: Caretaker of the Matrix, ready to light
our darkest hour.
276-300 Optimus Prime:  The one true leader of the Autobots.
       OR 
     Megatron:  Decepticon Ruler Supreme.

301+    You're not a Transformer, but there's a very nice room
reserved for you on Web World.


I reserve the right to edit all questions to correct spelling,
grammar, format, factual errors, or obsolete information.
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